The First Step to Nowhere

by LuIzA 177

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1.
2.
02:34
3.
04:13
4.
5.
6.
7.
03:49
8.
04:28
9.
05:21
10.
11.
12.
05:09

about

The year 2011 was one of major change for me. It was then that I decided to ditch engineering school a year and half from graduation, to pursue my dream: a career in the music industry. I was always acutely aware of the risks, but despite the fear, uncertainty and hardship ahead, this decision brought me a sense of liberation and fulfillment.
The First Step to Nowhere represents exactly that. Despite being on and off in production for roughly two years, it brought to life musical ideas that had been born as early as 2005. In many ways, this album is a compilation of everything I learned in 12 years of making music. Now in 2013, finally able to pursue the dream in Boston, it was time to wrap this up and move onto the next step...

Special thanks to:
Stevo Bortz (Level 99), Fernando Pires, David L. Puga (Joker), John Orr (The Last Domino), for helping to make this record as awesome as it is. ;D

Thanks to:
My parents, my awesome boyfriend Luccas, Guilherme 'Fox' Amato, the boys and girls from VGMChoir, the boys and girls from Mammoth Murmur, my friends in São Paulo and in Boston.

credits

released August 24, 2013

All songs written, produced, engineered, mixed and mastered by Luiza S. Carvalho.

Lyrics of tracks 2, 3, 4, 7 and 12 by Luiza S. Carvalho.
Lyrics of tracks 8 and 5 by Luiza S. Carvalho and Stevo Bortz (Level 99).
Lyrics of tracks 1 and 11 by Stevo Bortz (Level 99).
Lyrics of track 10 by John Orr (The Last Domino).

Additional writing in track 8 by Stevo Bortz (Level 99) and track 10 by John Orr (The Last Domino).

Vocals, Guitars, Bass, Sitar, Sequencing/Sound Design - Luiza S. Carvalho.
Back up Vocals in track 5 - Stevo Bortz (Level 99).
Alto Saxophone in track 10 - John Orr (The Last Domino).
Back up Vocals in track 11 - Luccas Menezes.

Cover Art by Fernando Pires.

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Track Name: Faces of Modernity
These days what are we people made of
Sullen stone eyes, sunken smiles so devoid of love
Every grin full to the brim of that plastic sincerity
and it's still killing me

Don't run away from the heartache
Hiding away while you fantasize, realize
Just what recovery will take
More than a man without compromise

(Starry skies) They echo the stars in your eyes
Holding the thoughts of thousand fractured nights
Seeing past, the future blinds
And burns away all the innocence left inside

The manequin, so chagrin, plaster left in pieces
Taped together to keep the last of hope inside
As every part soon falls away under gravity
The heart, it atrophies

Don't run away from the heartache
Hiding away while you fantasize, realize
Just what recovery will take
More than a man without compromise, starry

(Starry skies) They echo the stars in your eyes
Holding the thoughts of thousand fractured nights
Seeing past, the future blinds
And burns away all the innocence left inside

The manequin grins ith mouth full of lies
While the tourniquet twists and then renders them blind
Holding on to the thought of a thousand fractured nights
While it burns all the innocence left inside

Take it back
Track Name: Naysayer
Why do you have so mad
At my success, will you stop at nothing
To guarantee that I fail
But it’s your hope that you end up crushing
Is there nothing else for you to do?
Than talk shit about other’s lives
So what is in it for you?
I really don’t need you by my side

You say it won’t amount to anything
I’d rather ignore and get on with my life
You never support anything I ever do
So all I have to say is “fuck you”

Naysayer, keep your words at bay (and out of my face)
Betrayer, you’ll get it someday

You tell me I can’t just do that
It’s not that much when you think back, is it?
Your hindering words will just stall me
Yet you have nothing to warn me

You want to see me down but you’ll just hurt your pride
Take your nasty words and keep outta my life
I’ll never how bad you always want me to
So all I can say is “fuck you”

You say it won’t amount to anything
I’d rather ignore and get on with my life
You never support anything I ever do
So all I have to say is “fuck you”

Naysayer, you'll get it someday

(keep those words out of my face)
(get lost and leave back no trace)
(keep those words out of my face)
(cause I’ll be keeping my pace)

Betrayer, keep your words at bay

(keep those words out of my face)
(get lost and leave back no trace)
(keep those words out of my face)
(cause I’ll be keeping my pace)
Track Name: The Pandemic
Stultified
Has life no meaning?
Other than to consume and multiply
it's like I'm losing my soul
my life sucked into black hole
the first step toward nowhere
spinning out of control
override
the reason of mind
depression, the feeling of confines

I can't think straight
I can't steer fate
I can't keep from becoming what I hate most
I consume hate
I bear this weight
I can’t keep nature from taking its toll

No
It drops its anchor
Collective ignorance spreads like a cancer

It’s like I’m losing my mind
I’m afraid of what I will find
It’s all our fears combined
and we can’t leave it behind
Oh, but we meander
The opposite way of the answer.

The last straw has set in place
No one can save us now

I can't think straight
I can't steer fate
I can't keep from becoming what I hate most
I consume hate
I bear this weight
I can’t stop this tearing at my soul

I can't think straight
I can't steer fate
I can't keep from becoming what I hate most
I consume hate
I bear this weight
I can’t hope to ever be in control
Track Name: The Dusk (Fog)
I wish you couldn’t see me now
I’m breaking down into tears and pieces oh so small
And simple tasks so daunting
everything once bright now is so haunting

I can’t see light
In all of these dark clouds
I just feel rotten
In never ending night

Dawn turned to dusk so fast
Unifying the shadows it’s cast
The murk that lurks inside me
Then merges with the dagger that divides me

I just feel rotten
Inner peace forgotten
Existence is senseless
And deathwish relentless

Let's go

Deathwish relentless
Track Name: Little Lost Boy
He sits at home at night
He’s waiting for something he can't live without
And as time passes by
Like eternal inertia he won’t break out

And he's blind, his state of mind
No conviction
Yet he's fine deep inside
His world of fiction
No two words he can utter
Cause any friction
'Cause it's how it's been 'til now
No ambition

He can’t help it, he'll just settle for less
While his life's filled with boredom and no direction
Emotions obsolete, his fate can’t be concrete
Defrauds himself from a real connection

His night turns into day
It's his own callous desire to quit before he even starts
It's become his own cliché
He's so listless he averts his from his own mind's decay

Yet he won’t do shit about it
No fucks could he give to ever doubt it

He can’t help it, he'll just settle for less
While his life's filled with boredom and no direction
Emotions obsolete, his fate can’t be concrete
No hindsite affords him no real connection

Get up, Get out. Make this world your own

There’s a whole world inside him that he won’t leave
But he’s not satisfied inside it
While he seeks refuge inside his fantasies
His reality crumbles in apathy

He can’t help it, he'll just settle for less
While his life's filled with boredom and no direction
Emotions obsolete, his fate can’t be concrete
Defrauds himself from a real connection

He can’t help it, he'll just settle for less
While life's filled with boredom and no direction
Emotions obsolete, his fate can’t be concrete
No hindsite affords him no real connection

Get up, Get out. Make this world your own
Track Name: Original
I've been thinking, have we reached our full potential?
Is this how far we can go?
We’ve what it takes, we just gotta get up there
It would be nothing but fair
Tonight we’ll ride as one
We’ll never be outrun
We’ll stand tonight tall with pride
We’ll be original
We’ll make our goals reachable
Unleash your mind
Then spread your wings and fly

Come on
We’ve come a long way
It’s finally the day we stood strong
Go on
it’s our time to shine, it’ll be fine
It won’t be long

Why surprised
Don’t be so scared
‘Cause you can’t thrive
If you don’t dare

Ignite the fire
There's no shame to aspire
Just take to the skies and fly high

Come on
We’ve come a long way
(It’s time to find what’s hidden deep inside)
Go on
it’s our time to shine, it’ll be fine
It won’t be long
(Side by side I know we’ll be alright)

You’ve got to see that
You’ve got potential, baby
This is our time to glow
(but) You’ve got to know that
It ain’t shit until you grow
Just gotta take it slow

Come on
We’ve come a long way
(It’s time to find what’s hidden deep inside)
Go on
Side by side I know we’ll be alright
I will be alright
Track Name: Unbound
Faith
I never had the faith in you to bring us closer
Hate
The way you look down upon others of your own kind
Lies
I lied so many times to myself to make it through this
Life
You only live once, so I'm gonna take my chances
Now

Don’t say I won't see tomorrow
I can stand on my own two feet (yeah, stand on my two feet)
My soul was torn asunder
But you no longer have me to deplete

I'll live
I'll go on
Without you guiding me
Now I
Can see through
The Bullshit you fed me
I'll breathe
I'll move on
I'm gonna make it this time
I can now be myself

It's time to let go and move on, time to begin
Anew
Gone are the times when all that I could ever see was
You
I'll leave it all behind, there's nothing to remind you of
Me
I'll be myself again, I'm transformed, I've set me free

Don’t say we have to count the headstones
Like ashes falling from tattered skies above
My soul is torn asunder as the
Fireflies come light my way

I'll live
I'll go on
Without you guiding me
Now I
Can see through
The Bullshit you fed me
I'll breathe
I'll move on
I'm gonna make it this time
I can now be myself

Won’t say that I made it out without a scar
My mind has lost many battles but not the war
Today is just the prelude to tomorrow as I move ahead
Move ahead

I’m gonna walk across this bridge
Made with ropes that held me down
Over the rivers of despair
Onto the other side unbound

I'll live
I'll go on
Without you guiding me
Now I
Can see through
The Bullshit you fed me
I'll breathe
I'll move on
I'm gonna make it this time
I can now be myself
(Over the rivers of despair)
(Onto the other side unbound)
Track Name: Sea of your Love (feat. John Orr)
I can't explain for the life of me
Why my heart broke tempo and leapt up my throat
It's not like me to ever skip a beat
But you strip my voice of every single note

You make me feel like I could swim around the world
So let's dive in; let's just give it a whirl

In a sea of your love I could drown
Falling down in the abyss of you
Let the sea of your love pull me down
I can breathe as long as I'm with you

They'll be looking for us constantly
Wondering if we will ever come afloat
But we are comfortable down in the deep
They don't even need to send a rescue boat

In a sea of your love I could drown
Swallowed up in the abyss of you
Let the sea of your love pull me down
I can breathe as long as I'm with you
Track Name: Shout for the Meek
Wake up the weak
Don’t stand there pretending
Shout for the meek
The shuddered, the voiceless
Caught in the wake
A sandstorm of chaos
It’s really better than a silent protest

What does it really have to
Take to get moving and then make a change
It ain't all that tough
But he mad, the shrill, the callous,
The pathetic and the scandalous
The breeders, heeders, feeders, well, I’ve had enough!

Wake up the weak (wake up the weak)
Don't dare retreat (Don't dare retreat)
Get up and speak, express and
Start standing up for yourself
Track Name: The Dawn
I’d been bound by unseen chains
unable to withstand the pain
But now I found strength to break free
I can be everything that’s me

And I’m sure it’s high
It’s more than just a wall to climb

Go, spread my wings and bare my teeth
Flow, light and free
Glance on to new horizons
And dance on the ashes of bygones

(Here’re the) cards on the table
I may bluff but I won’t fold
So here’s to a long hard road
But one I’ll tread upon with pride

And I’m against time
But I will never shy from flight

Go, spread my wings and bare my teeth
Flow, light and free
Glance on to new horizons
And dance on the ashes of bygones

Go, spread my wings and bare my teeth
Flow, fast and free
Higher to new horizons
the Fire consumes what’s now bygone